My Abah...

As I was skyping with Hik not so long ago, (apart from showing off their pics laki bini riding on Husni's new superbike) she sent me this photo of Abah which was taken in the very good old days... tak tau thn bila lupa lak nak tanya, but i supposed during his 'bujang sunti' time la kot?! Hik passed remark to me, "Husni (Hik's hubby) kata rupa Abah masa ni sebijik mcm ko la Nom".

When I looked at it at first glance, hhmm ye la... ade rupa sket especially kat mata (which Abah used to tease me of having mata panjang sampai ketepi, mcm ayam... keh..kehh..kehhh...). But I thought this pic looked more like Haiat (the youngest) or Hakim (the 2nd)... not so much of me. Then, when Abaji looked at it later, he said, "Ehh... Abah ni rupa macam Hik la... iye la... macam Haziq pun ade..." (Haziq - Hik's elders son). Hahahahaa... aku terus terbarai gelak kuat2 teringat yg laki Hik kata rupa abah mcm aku, laki aku pulak kata rupa abah mcm Hik. Well, lots of people and sedara mara said both of us (me and my elder sister, Hikmah) look like Abah. But the fact is, rupa aku ngan Hik sikit pun tak sama langsung!.. Jauh berbeza sungguh!!!....

I think apart from my look, I inherited his genes more than I got from Emak. My character and behavior (including temperament, egoistic and 'keras kepala') are more towards Abah's. During my growing up days, especially teenage, I always had arguments and dissatisfaction with Abah. Due to that, and plus comparing his different treatment given to all 7 siblings, I had always thought that Abah didn't love me... or loved me the least.

But I’ve been through several changes as I grown up and started to have my own career and family. My perception towards Abah also has changed over the time. I know Abah loves me… he even told me that he loves me… (which I think very rare for typical Malay fathers express their feeling of love verbally to their adult children). My unique Abah, is of the extreme of two… he could be very2 fierce and intolerable bila naik darah (belasah anak2 pakai tali pinggang, tak hengattt punyerr... ni zaman dolu2 la.. takde teledera... hahahah...), but he is also a very sanguine, fun loving father, and always love to entertain his children. When abah buat lawak… memang all of us tergelak sakan sampai keluar air mata… He’s good at playing psychology with kids and his cucus are so bertuah having a granddad like him. No matter what, I really love my Abah and I always do.

Right now, aku sangat rindu nak dengar Abah main organ kat rumah. I called home again several days ago, and it was so painful to hear that Abah is re-hospitalized, dah 8 hari dah… (and no one telling me!!.. chessss!!). He's just discharged from the ward for not more than two weeks recently, and now kena masuk balik. Oh... sometimes I wish I were rich so I can dedicate private nurse and dietitian cum cook at home utk menguruskan hal2 kesihatan Abah and Emak. Being in the far away land and tak keja somemore, I can only pray for their well being and hapiness. And I really hope my brothers could take good care both of them well.



A person can have many children, but he/she can only have one true Abah and Emak. I just hope Allah give me enough rezeki and kesempatan utk jaga Abah and Emak for at least in this life… as I'm not sure I can be anak yg soleh enough for my doa to reach them in their next life later on… Or who knows if Allah wants me to go first before them … takut tak sempat merasa berbakti pada diorang.... Wallahualam…